My senior Pastor and the Music Minister have asked me take over the ministry and become the Pastor at an independent living facility that our church has had services at for the last fifteen years. It's called "The Church at Tregaron", has about twenty five people each Sunday. 99% women, from many different theological backgrounds, with an occasional husband or son attending. They are a lovely group of people, who are very caring and who are just appreciative that someone is taking the time to provide them spiritual care. They have been a very receptive to the Gospel Message but everyone has expressed already having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ our King.
The ministry team is made up of a gentlemen and two ladies who do all of the music and set up and one lady who does snacks and hands out hymnals and the bulletins. I have found that Lifesprings Church put some money into the equipment that we use. I have preached in many nursing, independent living and assisted living and only the really high end facility have anything to support a service. Our mother church really shows how much they care about these loving folks.
Personally, music has not and probably will never be a strength, unless we start singing like the Old Appalachia Baptist's? You'll have to look that one up, I found it really interesting. We sing hymns out of the old Baptist Hymnal and sometime the Music Leader gets a little excited. He really does love God's music and he just pours his whole self into rejoicing in God. I so enjoy watching a man who is on fire for the Lord and shares so much through his worship. It makes it hard to laugh and sing at the same time!
God has luckily gifted all of His people in different ways. I have to remember that though I have been there for a few months know, one of the Ladies and her now deceased husband started it 15 years ago and the music guy has been there almost as long. They are very gracious with me, even when they think I'm supposed to be the leader of our little circus but I'm supposed to do it the way it has always been, Ha, ha, ha...
It's all to the Glory of God! May he bless you and keep you close to His bosom!
Friday, March 13, 2020
Friday, December 13, 2019
What am I supposed to make of this?
What is being allowed, no not just allowed but promoted to our children? Sometimes the Bible plays out parts right in front of our faces, and yet we can't see it because we want to be...I don't know anymore! Romans tells us in chapter 1 verses 27-28 what we see in this picture and its an abomination.
"...and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done."
"...and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done."
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| An unknown person reading books to children in a public library |
Tuesday, October 8, 2019
Beth Moore: Complementarianism Is Like an Abused Woman
Why must the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) continue to go down this path? Mrs Moore, is using terrible tragedy of abuse within some SBC churches, for her own agenda and she should be ashamed. In some ways though, Mrs Moore is right, the abuse that happened is awful and should be punished to the full extent of the law, which should be handled locally. The SBC has has in the past celebrated the autonomy of the local church and it is up to the local church to handle these situations. It would seem that the denominations leadership and those who support Mrs Moore wish to view us like the Catholic Church, where it is a top down organization. They want to tell us what we are so very wrong at and how they know how to fix it. The leadership are trying to make the SBC into the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship, to go back to what it was before the conservatives.
Back to Mrs Moore, no one ever said this woman wasn't smart, Mrs Moore is giving the serpent a run for his money. In my life I have found the greatest of deceivers tell little lies, over long periods. These little lies, play on people's emotions, some little thing that may make them feel some guilt and most people hate to even think of themselves being the bad "guy". This changes how people, who are already inclined to believe her, find it easier to justify what Mrs Moore says. Mrs Moore, is just adding some lard to that slippery slope! Just like Eve she wants what she shouldn't have, so she is convincing everyone that there wrong instead.
Let's be nice, everyone want to be nice and Mrs Moore is talking about how these misogynistic men in leadership have used this idea of complementarianism as a tool to abuse women. We are just abusing women because we keep reading and trying to apply God's word, as its written. When will we stop trying to make everyone happy? Most of these people in the audience, watching her, have to be marginally Biblically illiterate or none of this would be an issue. I'm at the point where I believe that the men in this audience are... I don't even know how to say anything positive. Mrs Moore wants something and she is using this tragedy to get it.
It is a very similar issue that is being fought in the culture wars. Homosexuals, Pedophiles and transgender want to be recognized as normal (Mrs Moore has stated that we have been to hard on them to) and to be accepted throughout society for who they are. This is especially targeted at christians and institutions associated with the church. Deep in there hearts, they believe if they are accepted and normalized, then it will fill that empty place. The same goes for Mrs Moore, no amount of lies, misdirection or even the SBC leadership supporting her will make what she wants to be true. God does not call women to be Elders/Preacher/Teachers in His church.
Here is the article link: https://churchleaders.com
Back to Mrs Moore, no one ever said this woman wasn't smart, Mrs Moore is giving the serpent a run for his money. In my life I have found the greatest of deceivers tell little lies, over long periods. These little lies, play on people's emotions, some little thing that may make them feel some guilt and most people hate to even think of themselves being the bad "guy". This changes how people, who are already inclined to believe her, find it easier to justify what Mrs Moore says. Mrs Moore, is just adding some lard to that slippery slope! Just like Eve she wants what she shouldn't have, so she is convincing everyone that there wrong instead.
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| This is the face of the liberal resurgence |
It is a very similar issue that is being fought in the culture wars. Homosexuals, Pedophiles and transgender want to be recognized as normal (Mrs Moore has stated that we have been to hard on them to) and to be accepted throughout society for who they are. This is especially targeted at christians and institutions associated with the church. Deep in there hearts, they believe if they are accepted and normalized, then it will fill that empty place. The same goes for Mrs Moore, no amount of lies, misdirection or even the SBC leadership supporting her will make what she wants to be true. God does not call women to be Elders/Preacher/Teachers in His church.
Here is the article link: https://churchleaders.com
Thursday, September 12, 2019
Infanticide
This last February our elected officials voted on a series of bills about this topic of "infanticide", or in this case when an abortion is attempted and the child instead is born alive and medically viable. Here I have put two links, one is to Sen. Sasse's website, they host the actually floor talks and videos because no real debate happens. The other is to the actual bill, so you can read for yourself what was put forth.
1. Sen, Sasse's floor discussion
2. Senate Bill S.130
Senator Sasse, says "I want to ask each and every one of my colleagues whether we're okay with infanticide," this is blunt and our society today does not handle directness well. To often it seems we respond with screaming, running away or seeking safe spaces where the inhumanity that is happening can be soothed away with kind words. Here is a man who is at least trying to do what he has promised to do during his campaigning.
Looking at the date on this, you could probably be asking why would I be bringing this up now? First, I haven't been able to watch TV and these debates are usually shown on CSPAN at odd hours. Secondly, I had just heard the senate communities hearing being played on CSPAN radio and was heartbroken by a Nurses testimony and the hospitals policy for handling the "children" that survive. I had just read an article about Roman households and how if the Patreanus (head adult male) did not acknowledge a child after it has been born, the infant is taken and just put out on the sidewalk or a meaden heap!
It is a modern day euthanization of the unwanted, those who are weakest or the different are not being protected by those who can! To think, even worse is happening in Europe, it hurts my heart to think...
"Lord Jesus Christ Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner"
1. Sen, Sasse's floor discussion
2. Senate Bill S.130
Senator Sasse, says "I want to ask each and every one of my colleagues whether we're okay with infanticide," this is blunt and our society today does not handle directness well. To often it seems we respond with screaming, running away or seeking safe spaces where the inhumanity that is happening can be soothed away with kind words. Here is a man who is at least trying to do what he has promised to do during his campaigning.
Looking at the date on this, you could probably be asking why would I be bringing this up now? First, I haven't been able to watch TV and these debates are usually shown on CSPAN at odd hours. Secondly, I had just heard the senate communities hearing being played on CSPAN radio and was heartbroken by a Nurses testimony and the hospitals policy for handling the "children" that survive. I had just read an article about Roman households and how if the Patreanus (head adult male) did not acknowledge a child after it has been born, the infant is taken and just put out on the sidewalk or a meaden heap!
It is a modern day euthanization of the unwanted, those who are weakest or the different are not being protected by those who can! To think, even worse is happening in Europe, it hurts my heart to think...
"Lord Jesus Christ Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner"
Saturday, August 10, 2019
Loving Jesus even when I don't understand people!
I'm preaching from John 5:1-9 but I also touch versus' 10-14. While prepping for this sermon, it struck me that Jesus heals this man and the man just gets up and walks away. This guy has been a cripple for 38 years and BAM! you're healed. I would be dancing, singing and celebrating because I'm whole, but who just came up and asks "Do you want to be healed". Then this dude (I am not trying to be disrespectful to Jesus, dude is just my internal dialogues use of terminology for identification) say's, "Get up, take your bed and walk", BAM!, there would be dancing from this man, hugging and kissing anybody who wasn't faster then my amazingly healed self.
John 5:1-9 All scripture is from the English Standard Version (ESV)
5 After this there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem.2 Now there is in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate a pool, in Aramaic[a]called Bethesda,[b] which has five roofed colonnades. 3 In these lay a multitude of invalids—blind, lame, and paralyzed.[c] 5 One man was there who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had already been there a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to be healed?” 7 The sick man answered him, “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.” 8 Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” 9 And at once the man was healed, and he took up his bed and walked. Now that day was the Sabbath.
Wednesday, May 24, 2017
People are people no matter what!
Why would someone, in this case myself, say "People are people, no matter what"? I believe that we are losing how special we really are. I do understand that we are all totally depraved individuals, only seeking self gratification but there is a cultural shift to make people no longer special but God did.
"Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”
"Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”
" So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them."
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them."
And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be
fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have
dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and
over every living thing that moves on the earth.” (Genesis 1:26-28 ESV)
I hear it all the time, you can't pick or read any articles that deals with humanity, medical or ethics and not find it mentioned but what is it? The quality of life, is usually the word thrown around. Just imagine you've just had your first baby and the Doctor and Nurses are fussing and you think somethings wrong. Then they bring you your baby and you notice she has downs syndrome. The Nurse, pats you on your shoulder and tells you shes so sorry.
I use this incomplete illustration because I have heard Doctors and Nurses who have said "this child should not have been allowed to be born, what is there quality of life going to be". What they have forgotten is that even this beautiful child is created in the image of God and dismissed because she's not going to be like everyone else. That's OK, because you know everyone else usually isn't so great, that's why the path to Hell is a broad road.
I want to leave on a question because there is a lot more and I want to continue talking about this. The question is: "How do we steer society back to one that celebrates life?"...to be continued...
Sunday, November 27, 2016
Being Positive and Proactive
Dear Friends,
As I have been walking along this path that God has set before me, I have found that even when it all goes wrong He is still great. I find that I get tired of writing about negative things all of the time, it is both draining to you but to myself as well. Even though I could put many things up on this blog about negative things, I have decided I wont.
So, lets look at the goodness and greatness of what God has been doing. The most exciting is that I have a wonderful family, with a wife who I know loves me. I am also going to get to co-teach a Pastoral Care and Counseling extension class. The local SBC Association is administering it for MBTS and we have a great DOM and Association. If you know me, you know that I am very hands on, I love to teach and I loved to be involved with people. Only God could have set this in my path because so many hurdles had to be jumped and it was done by so many others.
Another thing that I am excited about but hasn't happened yet is that I have put in some applications for online teaching jobs. These would be great if they worked out both financially but also would add some fun. Remember though pray for my family and myself, just as I pray for those whom I know and for everyone in general. Though if you need more pray let me know, I do love direct prayer for people whom I care for. Love you all...
I have decided to become involved in some specific issues in Nebraska.
1. I am against the "Die with Dignity Laws" that are being introduced across the country. We have a state senator here who has introduced it for the last several years and will continue to do so. This is a slippery slope and people are misinformed.
2. My family and I are going to get involved in the anti-abortion movement in Omaha Metro area. Prayer is going to be our biggest weapon but we wish to show our children how to be active in our faith.
3. My children wish to be involved more with the homeless problem in the Omaha Metro area. Haven't exactly figured out how to do this but my heart swells with there express of compassion for those without and in need.
4. This is one that I have been involved with for a few years. Its two parts, first being the treatment of the poor when they die. Secondly, getting green burials legalized in the state of Nebraska .
As I have been walking along this path that God has set before me, I have found that even when it all goes wrong He is still great. I find that I get tired of writing about negative things all of the time, it is both draining to you but to myself as well. Even though I could put many things up on this blog about negative things, I have decided I wont.
So, lets look at the goodness and greatness of what God has been doing. The most exciting is that I have a wonderful family, with a wife who I know loves me. I am also going to get to co-teach a Pastoral Care and Counseling extension class. The local SBC Association is administering it for MBTS and we have a great DOM and Association. If you know me, you know that I am very hands on, I love to teach and I loved to be involved with people. Only God could have set this in my path because so many hurdles had to be jumped and it was done by so many others.
Another thing that I am excited about but hasn't happened yet is that I have put in some applications for online teaching jobs. These would be great if they worked out both financially but also would add some fun. Remember though pray for my family and myself, just as I pray for those whom I know and for everyone in general. Though if you need more pray let me know, I do love direct prayer for people whom I care for. Love you all...
I have decided to become involved in some specific issues in Nebraska.
1. I am against the "Die with Dignity Laws" that are being introduced across the country. We have a state senator here who has introduced it for the last several years and will continue to do so. This is a slippery slope and people are misinformed.
2. My family and I are going to get involved in the anti-abortion movement in Omaha Metro area. Prayer is going to be our biggest weapon but we wish to show our children how to be active in our faith.
3. My children wish to be involved more with the homeless problem in the Omaha Metro area. Haven't exactly figured out how to do this but my heart swells with there express of compassion for those without and in need.
4. This is one that I have been involved with for a few years. Its two parts, first being the treatment of the poor when they die. Secondly, getting green burials legalized in the state of Nebraska .
Wednesday, September 21, 2016
I was just reflecting on a passage from Scripture because I have a bone deep weariness.
"11 Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. 12 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account." Hebrew 4:11-13.
As I find my self more and more consumed with the cares of this world, the less and less joy I seem to have. I was at a NAMB event over this last weekend and we were told that we needed to prepare a short sermonette, about 8 minutes. My Bible time and my time with God lately has been like a desert but the sermon.
There was joy, my heart seemed to sing out to God and the beauty of His word sung to me. For the last several years all I have had the opportunity to delivery has been funeral sermons. I do realize the importance and can be important evangelism tools but preaching Gods word, that different. When I preached those 8 minutes it felt like it was "right", that's the best way to explain it.
The weariness lifted, it seemed as if I had walked out of the desert from which I had put myself. Its funny how we do this, I work a bunch of "ministry" jobs that barely pay, have incredibly odd hours, very high demands and seem to be hurting my family. I have made the excuses for the longer time in between family devotions and my devotions with my wife. My own spiritual life is in the tank; it would seem from doing the very ministry that I should be working harder on my own spiritual life for.
God is good, in one days study for an 8 minute sermonette He corrected me with His love, wow!
"11 Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. 12 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account." Hebrew 4:11-13.
As I find my self more and more consumed with the cares of this world, the less and less joy I seem to have. I was at a NAMB event over this last weekend and we were told that we needed to prepare a short sermonette, about 8 minutes. My Bible time and my time with God lately has been like a desert but the sermon.
There was joy, my heart seemed to sing out to God and the beauty of His word sung to me. For the last several years all I have had the opportunity to delivery has been funeral sermons. I do realize the importance and can be important evangelism tools but preaching Gods word, that different. When I preached those 8 minutes it felt like it was "right", that's the best way to explain it.
The weariness lifted, it seemed as if I had walked out of the desert from which I had put myself. Its funny how we do this, I work a bunch of "ministry" jobs that barely pay, have incredibly odd hours, very high demands and seem to be hurting my family. I have made the excuses for the longer time in between family devotions and my devotions with my wife. My own spiritual life is in the tank; it would seem from doing the very ministry that I should be working harder on my own spiritual life for.
God is good, in one days study for an 8 minute sermonette He corrected me with His love, wow!
Sunday, August 21, 2016
Once again life is a learning opportunity for us who are ill equipped with the basic tools needed for everyday, well Life.
My family have been attempting to get a second vehicle for a long, long time but just have never been able to do it. It usually has been finance related, as a one income household taking on a car payment just doesn't make much sense. In addition someone has to be willing to sale a car to someone with less than perfect credit, its getting better but still not stellar. This usually regulates people in our circumstances to buy here pay here places. These people pray on those who are not able to purchase a car another way and fall into what seems to be an unregulated nightmare similar to payday loan hovels, but I digress...
We did not go to one of these places to finance our vehicle, we were blessed from some friends who in all purposes gave us a van. Suddenly we have two vehicles and just as suddenly the second van begins to develp issues. At this same time we also got our tax returns, which we had not been expecting due to other issues and used to catch us up on bills but did leave us with some left over.
The intelligent thing to do would to have fixed the one van and saved the difference but I guess I'm not that smart. We decided to use the old van and the cash to hopefully get a good deal. Have I mentioned the fact that I know nothing about cars, I mean very little. We got ripped off! I should have just walked up and handed some stranger the keys to our van and the money and said have a good day because that would have probably helped someone. I did attempt to talk to the car dealer but he was unapologetic but did offered to take the car back, see what he could get for it at auction then put me in something "nicer", maybe at a discounted rate. The other option he had was there are a group of mechanics he works with and he would be happy to direct me towards one of them. Ha, ha...fool me once shame on me.
There are so many things wrong with this vehicle but I am trying to work them out so that Sarah is not stranded at home. Today I attempted to change my own oil, I watched the videos on YouTube and I had all the stuff. I crawled underneath, or as far as I could get and loosened the bolt and out the oil came into the pan. My oldest is sunder the car and says "Dad is oil supposed to be red"? well no its not!
I had just drained my transmission, which doesn't have a refill spout but you need a funny tool and brains to be able to fill it. It just gets worse from there but I know if I die right at this moment I will go to Heaven but some of the things coming out of my mouth did not edify God in anyway. In all of this I am just happy that my wife is OK, my children are healthy and God has a lot of grace because I don't.
Why can't I forgive this man who lied and stole money from my family? He will continue to cost me money into the for see able future. Why can't I forgive myself for feeling so foolish, feeling like I have let my family down and put undo stress onto my wife who really doesn't need any. Why can't I be more like my Savior and forgive? Why, why, why...?
My family have been attempting to get a second vehicle for a long, long time but just have never been able to do it. It usually has been finance related, as a one income household taking on a car payment just doesn't make much sense. In addition someone has to be willing to sale a car to someone with less than perfect credit, its getting better but still not stellar. This usually regulates people in our circumstances to buy here pay here places. These people pray on those who are not able to purchase a car another way and fall into what seems to be an unregulated nightmare similar to payday loan hovels, but I digress...
We did not go to one of these places to finance our vehicle, we were blessed from some friends who in all purposes gave us a van. Suddenly we have two vehicles and just as suddenly the second van begins to develp issues. At this same time we also got our tax returns, which we had not been expecting due to other issues and used to catch us up on bills but did leave us with some left over.
The intelligent thing to do would to have fixed the one van and saved the difference but I guess I'm not that smart. We decided to use the old van and the cash to hopefully get a good deal. Have I mentioned the fact that I know nothing about cars, I mean very little. We got ripped off! I should have just walked up and handed some stranger the keys to our van and the money and said have a good day because that would have probably helped someone. I did attempt to talk to the car dealer but he was unapologetic but did offered to take the car back, see what he could get for it at auction then put me in something "nicer", maybe at a discounted rate. The other option he had was there are a group of mechanics he works with and he would be happy to direct me towards one of them. Ha, ha...fool me once shame on me.
There are so many things wrong with this vehicle but I am trying to work them out so that Sarah is not stranded at home. Today I attempted to change my own oil, I watched the videos on YouTube and I had all the stuff. I crawled underneath, or as far as I could get and loosened the bolt and out the oil came into the pan. My oldest is sunder the car and says "Dad is oil supposed to be red"? well no its not!
I had just drained my transmission, which doesn't have a refill spout but you need a funny tool and brains to be able to fill it. It just gets worse from there but I know if I die right at this moment I will go to Heaven but some of the things coming out of my mouth did not edify God in anyway. In all of this I am just happy that my wife is OK, my children are healthy and God has a lot of grace because I don't.
Why can't I forgive this man who lied and stole money from my family? He will continue to cost me money into the for see able future. Why can't I forgive myself for feeling so foolish, feeling like I have let my family down and put undo stress onto my wife who really doesn't need any. Why can't I be more like my Savior and forgive? Why, why, why...?
Sunday, August 14, 2016
The current state of affiars of the Winn's family circus!
Hello and welcome to the mighty few who are reading this, may this find you better then when we may have last spoken.
As the point of all blogs, I will just start by talking about me, because why else would you be reading this...
My current employment/vocation:
Finally, Sarah, the children and I are currently in the process of going through the discernment process for church planting with NAMB. A lot of personality tests, with some meeting and seminars, all to see if we are self starters and have the right personality to have an effective church plant. Why would you say that I would put my family and myself through this, well let me tell you. I first and foremost would not be doing this unless Sarah and I did not feel we were being lead this way.
Sarah and I have had a heart for military families since we came to know Christ. Our hearts have been getting heavier and heavier as we see and hear what is going on with these men and women. Then one day while attempting to get my endorsement stuff done for the umpteenth time with NAMB, I was lead to military church planting, asking are you a chaplain, do you have a heart for our military and BAMM! God got me again....More to come!
As the point of all blogs, I will just start by talking about me, because why else would you be reading this...
My current employment/vocation:
- I am working part time as a hospice chaplain for Fremont Homecare and Hospice, in of course Fremont Nebraska. The job is good, it has great benefits and the pay would fantastic if I got more than 20 maybe 25 hours a week. I love the fact that I get to help those who are so often so lost and lonely. I have felt it one of the greatest privilege next to being a witness for Christ is being with someone as they die. Though its not always spiritually lost, American nursing homes have turned into dumping grounds for our unwanted elderly (that's a diatribe for another time).
- I am working as a PRN chaplain at Bergan Mercy hospital, mostly overnight on-calls. This can be rough because even though they have a sleep room, I can never sleep with a pager sitting around. Every noise causes me to jerk awake and for 30.00 dollars for 15.5 hours its hard to dedicate the time for this job. Though the supervisor is great makes it hard to say no when she is so very nice.
- I am working as a PRN chaplain at Creighton University Medical Center, a level 1 trauma hospital that can really be a crazy place. This is the job for an adrenaline junky, because it is absolute stillness then 100 miles an hour of human destruction. This can be very rewarding and it can be heartbreaking within a heartbeat.
Finally, Sarah, the children and I are currently in the process of going through the discernment process for church planting with NAMB. A lot of personality tests, with some meeting and seminars, all to see if we are self starters and have the right personality to have an effective church plant. Why would you say that I would put my family and myself through this, well let me tell you. I first and foremost would not be doing this unless Sarah and I did not feel we were being lead this way.
Sarah and I have had a heart for military families since we came to know Christ. Our hearts have been getting heavier and heavier as we see and hear what is going on with these men and women. Then one day while attempting to get my endorsement stuff done for the umpteenth time with NAMB, I was lead to military church planting, asking are you a chaplain, do you have a heart for our military and BAMM! God got me again....More to come!
Thursday, August 11, 2016
Start Again
Trying to restart writing a blog. It may work or it may not, either way I'm going to try again.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
2010 and counting
I got lost for almost an entire year and now I have found myself! Funny how that works.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
I welcome 2009, even though it doesnt need my approval!
For the few people who read my blog, happy new year! It has been along time since I posted anything and feel a little guilty. I have struggled this last few months with some pretty deep emotional and spiritual issues. All made that much more difficult by the conflict in former church and My family choosing to leave it. I am hoping that 2009 will offer both a time to heal and a time to grow in my faith.
The kids are doing great and mom is well, for everyone who knows my wife she is being Sarah. I am blessed, outside of our Lord, they are my rock. I am still in the process of becoming a chaplain candidate for the Missouri National Guard. I have several decisions to make in this upcoming semester.
The Things I must Decide:
1. I can graduate in the spring of 2010 with one degree (M.Div or MACO)
2. Or I can graduate in the spring of 2011 with both (Both M.Div and MACO)
3. If I do the CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) residency it pushes everything back an additional year.
4. A couple of my professors think I should go on and get my PhD, in either pastoral care and counseling or in just counseling. They think I would be good at training future chaplains or people who care and counsel others.
They all sound simple, but in order to graduate with both or just one I have to schedule classes in an exact way. CPE will throw everything off! Also, with the Guard and active duty options I have to look at deployment immediately after graduation. Which is OK but then what do I do, especially if I am still in the Guard? Then if you throw in the whole getting a Doctorate, an actual PhD, not a D.Min, that's three years of classes and an additional two years to write a minimum of a hundred page desertion.
So, please pray for me! First for discernment of God's will and to bring my will into alignment with His. Secondly, what ever decision that I do end up making that my family and I can find peace with it.
The kids are doing great and mom is well, for everyone who knows my wife she is being Sarah. I am blessed, outside of our Lord, they are my rock. I am still in the process of becoming a chaplain candidate for the Missouri National Guard. I have several decisions to make in this upcoming semester.
The Things I must Decide:
1. I can graduate in the spring of 2010 with one degree (M.Div or MACO)
2. Or I can graduate in the spring of 2011 with both (Both M.Div and MACO)
3. If I do the CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) residency it pushes everything back an additional year.
4. A couple of my professors think I should go on and get my PhD, in either pastoral care and counseling or in just counseling. They think I would be good at training future chaplains or people who care and counsel others.
They all sound simple, but in order to graduate with both or just one I have to schedule classes in an exact way. CPE will throw everything off! Also, with the Guard and active duty options I have to look at deployment immediately after graduation. Which is OK but then what do I do, especially if I am still in the Guard? Then if you throw in the whole getting a Doctorate, an actual PhD, not a D.Min, that's three years of classes and an additional two years to write a minimum of a hundred page desertion.
So, please pray for me! First for discernment of God's will and to bring my will into alignment with His. Secondly, what ever decision that I do end up making that my family and I can find peace with it.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Learning Through Pain
If you are in church long enough, especially in the ministry, you will hear horror stories about how we as believers treat each other. This was one of the biggest shocks that I think happened to me, the fact that we profess so much love,caring and grace for our fellow believers yet when things go bad, as they are prone to do then they will be the first to point fingers. Before Christ called me to Him, I truthfully didn't like people, most could not be trusted and the ones that I did took a very long time to earn that trust, most relationships where very superficial. Then Christ goes and saves me, makes me want to love my fellow man, something completely antithetical to me and at first I thought how am I going to do this?
I opened myself up to His word and studied, I tried to live out the "Love thy neighbor as thyself" even though at first I did not agree or understand. I expected non-believers to turn on me, show me there true selves but to be bitten by those who profess to care for me, really caused me heart pain. See, Christ changed my heart, he gave me one of flesh that really feels and with that can come pain, which I am completely not able to deal with on my own.
If you don't know me then I will tell you something about myself, I fall into the Reformed school of thought. I am a 4 point Calvinist, because I cannot find any true evidence for Limited Atonement, this is just some background to explain part of my outpouring. If you listen to most people who profess to be reformed and listen for any length of time, they will talk about Grace. Yet, I have found that many lose any sense of Grace or what Grace truthfully means. God's Grace is awesome, its what saved a sinner like me, yet many of my fellow reformed types miss it all together.
They have become bogged down in a Neo-Pharisaical Legalism, not showing Grace and Love but use the Bible as a hammer to beat people to conform to what they believe is right. They have lost or maybe just missed the section where Jesus (also through out the epistles) that we are to do all thing out of love. We get tied up with all of head knowledge without it ever touching our hearts, so we judge people with impossible standards and leave out any Love or Grace.
I was hurt very badly by those whom I loved the most here on earth. I believe that there is a reason for everything but that doesn't help with the pain. I have to switch churches, move my family to a new body of believers, hoping that it wont happen again. All the while I am trying to truly forgive those who have caused my family and myself this pain, so if you are reading this please pray not only for me but for those who have caused this.
I opened myself up to His word and studied, I tried to live out the "Love thy neighbor as thyself" even though at first I did not agree or understand. I expected non-believers to turn on me, show me there true selves but to be bitten by those who profess to care for me, really caused me heart pain. See, Christ changed my heart, he gave me one of flesh that really feels and with that can come pain, which I am completely not able to deal with on my own.
If you don't know me then I will tell you something about myself, I fall into the Reformed school of thought. I am a 4 point Calvinist, because I cannot find any true evidence for Limited Atonement, this is just some background to explain part of my outpouring. If you listen to most people who profess to be reformed and listen for any length of time, they will talk about Grace. Yet, I have found that many lose any sense of Grace or what Grace truthfully means. God's Grace is awesome, its what saved a sinner like me, yet many of my fellow reformed types miss it all together.
They have become bogged down in a Neo-Pharisaical Legalism, not showing Grace and Love but use the Bible as a hammer to beat people to conform to what they believe is right. They have lost or maybe just missed the section where Jesus (also through out the epistles) that we are to do all thing out of love. We get tied up with all of head knowledge without it ever touching our hearts, so we judge people with impossible standards and leave out any Love or Grace.
I was hurt very badly by those whom I loved the most here on earth. I believe that there is a reason for everything but that doesn't help with the pain. I have to switch churches, move my family to a new body of believers, hoping that it wont happen again. All the while I am trying to truly forgive those who have caused my family and myself this pain, so if you are reading this please pray not only for me but for those who have caused this.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
How God changes His children
I have finally finished my first credit hour of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE). This summer program changed my life. I spent upwards of 70 hours a week at the hospital, Saint Luke's in Kansas City. A lot of the time was split between Saint Luke's on the Plaza and Saint Luke's South, which anyone from Missouri or Kansas knows Johnson County. Each hospital had its own personality, of staff, patients and experiences.
God opened my eyes to what the effect of the Fall is and just how far we are away from our heavenly Father. How sin ravages our bodies, a lifetime of it effects everything, even how we die. How our pride and arrogance keep us separated from His glory and the amazing gift of Christ crucification but also the strength that the Holy Spirit can bestow. I have seen mankind's underbelly, people who have worked hard to be good and who become the targets of random violence just because of where they live. Hatred of Man for Man and how that is played out in our interactions with each other, beating, stabbings and abandonment. The ravages of drugs, alcohol, on the person and there families and finally death. Watching death and how it can be so utterly terrifying or can be such a sign of His Grace. Watching people deny God and die, I would realize that there suffering wasn't ending as they hope but was going to be eternal. Do you know how heart wrenching that can be, how you can plead with someone, praying that the Holy Spirit would come and dwell within them, asking if not begging them to except Christ. Only to watch them die, unrepentant and afraid?
God also showed me how love and compassion knows no race, age or gender. That He pours out His love to us and carries us through what should and can be the scariest things that ever happen to us. How many believers ministered to me, the Chaplain Intern, in his times of need. They where the ones sick, they where the ones in need of compassion, yet the Spirit moved them and gave them strength to minister to me and show me love. The love that comes from the fellowship of believers and how they can bring that to those in greatest need.
I ran out of my own strength about the 3rd week, God put me in my place. I got what is called "Compassion Fatigue", or as it may be better known as type of burn out. I cared to much, opened myself to others peoples emotions and suffering to much and tried to do it all on my own strength. I was taught how to rely not on myself but on God and the people He puts in my path. I will expand on all these topics, the people I met (no real names) and my current school semester, soon...
God opened my eyes to what the effect of the Fall is and just how far we are away from our heavenly Father. How sin ravages our bodies, a lifetime of it effects everything, even how we die. How our pride and arrogance keep us separated from His glory and the amazing gift of Christ crucification but also the strength that the Holy Spirit can bestow. I have seen mankind's underbelly, people who have worked hard to be good and who become the targets of random violence just because of where they live. Hatred of Man for Man and how that is played out in our interactions with each other, beating, stabbings and abandonment. The ravages of drugs, alcohol, on the person and there families and finally death. Watching death and how it can be so utterly terrifying or can be such a sign of His Grace. Watching people deny God and die, I would realize that there suffering wasn't ending as they hope but was going to be eternal. Do you know how heart wrenching that can be, how you can plead with someone, praying that the Holy Spirit would come and dwell within them, asking if not begging them to except Christ. Only to watch them die, unrepentant and afraid?
God also showed me how love and compassion knows no race, age or gender. That He pours out His love to us and carries us through what should and can be the scariest things that ever happen to us. How many believers ministered to me, the Chaplain Intern, in his times of need. They where the ones sick, they where the ones in need of compassion, yet the Spirit moved them and gave them strength to minister to me and show me love. The love that comes from the fellowship of believers and how they can bring that to those in greatest need.
I ran out of my own strength about the 3rd week, God put me in my place. I got what is called "Compassion Fatigue", or as it may be better known as type of burn out. I cared to much, opened myself to others peoples emotions and suffering to much and tried to do it all on my own strength. I was taught how to rely not on myself but on God and the people He puts in my path. I will expand on all these topics, the people I met (no real names) and my current school semester, soon...
Friday, March 21, 2008
My first post
Sorry to anyone taking time to read this blog. I am starting my first blog and am struggling to figure out all of the technology behind it. A little history about myself, if anyone should find this out in the ether. I am a 35 year old seminary student, working on both an M.Div and MACO or Masters in Christian Counseling. I am married to a wonderful women know for eight years, we have three wonderful kids, all under three. I am trying to lose weight to get back into the Army as a Chaplain, which is difficult with my life spent in books. I start my course at the St. Luke's Hospital in Kansas City, about how to become a Hospital Chaplain in May, or as it commonly called the CPE program. So, right at this moment, I think, God has me exactly where he wants me!
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